I can’t tell if I’m being a bitch or not

As of late, I’ve slipped into this pattern or being. All I want to do is be by myself, meditate, be calm and help the wonderful people I work with. I work almost all day every day now and my bosses have gotten keen on calling me in, or asking me to stay to just run around the entire place and help out and I really enjoy it. I like helping everyone all the time. I bring in candy for everyone, I got buy people red bulls, i feel great and I get paid to do it! how great is that? really great, but I’ve been neglecting my real life as I call it. Caleb and Zach and Ant and everyone, I haven’t seen all of them together in months. we’re all separating and it feels so weird to go out into my own world that I’ve created for myself. I get this rewarding life because I worked hard and I try with all of my heart to see who you are, see the wonderful things, and then give you all of the help that I can. Every one of my co-workers appreciates me and I can feel it. They get excited when I walk in the door and I get applauded every day for a day well done. I’m proud of this and I also feel like a piece of shit bitch for ignoring all of my friends. Caleb is breaking up with me as I type this and I honestly don’t know how to handle it. I’m not crying. wow I’m so stumped but hopeful.